Bas Yun Hi….

The clock is about to strike one in the morning. Have been successful in penning down something. Nothing like a masterpiece, just a small attempt in putting words to some feelings which definitely is not an easy thing to do.
Not to forget, everything is copyright here…:). it’s been written in Hindi and I really do not know how to type the text in ‘Devanagri’ letters…This is going to be a tough job to understand the true context and meaning of the words…

“Mein aj bhi us insaan ko dhundti hun,
Jo sirf mere liye bana hoga,
Jiski har hansi mein meri hansi ki khankhanahat hogi,
Jo meri hi tarah, baarish ki boondon ko palko par girata hoga,
Jo meri hi tarah hawa se baat karke,
khud apne ap se kuch gungunata hoga,
Jiski ankhon mein honge utne hi khwab,
jitni ki samandar mein lahrein,
Jo meri hi tarah, mujhe kahin dundta hoga,
Mein aj bhi us insaan ko dhundti hun!!

Mein aj bhi us mukaam ko dhundti hun,
Jo sirf mere liye bana hoga,
Jis mukaam ko aj tak kisi ne na chua hoga,
Jis mukaam ke chappe-2 par mera naam likha hoga,
jis mukaam ki pehchaan mujhse hogi,
Jo meri hi tarah sadiyon se mujhe dhund raha hoga,
Mein aj bhi us mukaam ko dhundti hun!!

Mein aj bhi un jajbaton ko dhundti hun,
Jo samay ki raah mein kahin kho gaye the,
Seene se laga ke rakhti thi jinhe,
Par savera hote hi so gaye the,
Jajbat jinhe mein bas kudrat ko bataya karti thi,
Issi masumiyat par to kudrat bhi fida thi,
Tabhi to aaj bhi aakar mujhse kehti hai,
Tu us samay sabse juda thi,
Baadal meri baat sunne ke liye thahar jate the,
Wo jajbaat jo meri hi tarah mujhe dhunda karte the,
Mein aj bhi un jajbaton ko dhundti hun!! “

Mistakes…

Why do we make mistakes..

So we can live life, feel something else than a robotic monotone of the ‘perfect life’…

So we learn and have wrinkles of character in our otherwise flawless personalities..

So we get up in the morning, and not feel that we did not try enough…

So that we never have to realize that we were afraid to take that extra step which would have led us to the fork in the road that led to either absolute bliss or total destruction of everything we hold dear…

So we know what pain, laughter, sadness, bliss, loneliness and peace actually mean…

So we learn the true nature of man..whatever we choose to believe it really is like..

So when we sit down to write the story of our life, we actually have some learning and messages for our children..

Yes, I have made the one and only mistake in my life because I wanted to be assured that when I get up early the next morning, I should not feel that I did not try enough….”
I did…..But, all in all it has been and will remain as my favorite mistake!

Source: Facebook notes – Copyright: Naina Sharma

Humming…

“I don’t want to waste your time,
And tell you how I’m lonely,
But I can’t help to stop myself,
Because you are my one and only,
I’m trying to get close to you,
Don’t know what I can do with,
You may think I’m faking it up,
And you may not believe it..”

“Tere bina tere bina,
Mushkil hai mera jeena.

Tere bina tere bina,
Jaau to jaau kahan.

Dhoondhu tujhe, main darbadar,
Tanha hai dil ka safar.

Baharo nazaaro sitaaro mein dekha,
Saba mein fiza mein tujhko hi payaa,
Baharo nazaaro sitaaro mein dekha,
Dekha tujhe raat bhar,
Aaja mahi aaja mahi, aaja ab toh aa jaa”

“Jaage saari raat main,
Tere intezaar mein,
Aaja mahi aaja mahi, aaja ab toh aa jaa,
Hooo aaja mahi aaja mahi, aaja ab to aa jaa…

Mujhe meri rab ki kasam,
Yu naa marr jau sanam.

Faasle kab honge kam,
Thamne lagi hai dhadkan.

Sadiyon se bhi kuch kam nahi,
Lamha jo hai mukasar.

Baharo nazaaro sitaaro mein dekha,
Saba mein fiza mein tujhko hi paaya,
Baharo nazaaro sitaaro mein dekha,
Dekha tujhe raat bhar..”

Thanks Airtel and Thanks Bhagwan ji

Airtel – for keeping me out of some irritating stuff at 12:30 at night when I am already fighting the biggest battle to reclaim my life, hope, happiness, and love back. I had not expected their help at the middle of the night, when I don’t have anybody at this hour to hear what problem I was about to fall in couple of minutes back. When I think about it, I start shivering. I went downstairs to seek help from Dad, but then realized he will get tensed. Came up called shona (can’t think of anyone else when I am in trouble), could not reach him, despite all efforts.
And then it was Airtel guy, thank you guys! You deserve every pie of that hectic bill that you send me every month.

Next, thank you bhagwan ji! And I mean it from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for reclaiming my faith, thank you for the unknown courage that you gave me to hold on, thank you for letting me have this life and these experiences.
In a nut shell, thank you for everything. I am sooo happy, we share this beautiful bond. And I am really sorry for forgetting you in between. Guess you always thought about me :) Thank you for little little things that you do in between – like getting me the right doctor at the right time, when I had lost hope. Today, if I can start smiling, its all because of her. And thank you for giving me such beautiful parents, who still love me for whatever damaged masterpiece I am :D . Who came to understand that my happiness lies somewhere else, with something, with somebody, and I should really have it, if it is meant to be. (Thanks Mom for taling with me today evening, I guess my not eating a single meal for last two days, does not go so well, but I am sorry. And I promise, once I find my way, I will be back; just let me give this last shot!)

And yes bhagwaan ji, thank you for the little gift that you sent me today. It was really thoughtful of you. As if you knew what I needed at this time. Gratitude is what I am feeling right now. :) :) After two days, now I seriously want to eat something, can I get maggi?? ;)

I am really not sure, what designs have been made up in the sky. But whatever it is, please don’t ever leave me alone. And i promise you, I will always try to hold my trust in FAITH and LOVE.(The two nick-names that I want my kids to have. They help a person to hold out to life, no matter what!

Thanks once again! Good night! :) :)

Rehna Tu – Beautiful Song

Amazing song…and when you hear it on an amazing walkman player….effect is all the more!

I like this song more than ‘Jai ho’, Rehman effect is more visible in this!
“Rehna Tu
Hai Jaisa Tu
Thoda sa dard tu
Thoda Sukun

Rehna Tu
Hai Jaisa Tu
Dheema Dheema jhonka
Ya phir junoon
Thoda sa resham
Tu humdam
Thoda sa khurdura
Kabhi daud jaye
Ya lad jaye
Ya khushboo se bhara

Tujhe badal na na chahoon
Rati bhar bhi sanam
Bina sajawat milawat
Na jyaada na hi kaam

Tuhje chaahon jaisa hai tu
Mujhe tere baarish mein bheegna hai ghuljana hai
Tujhe chaahon jaisa hai tu
Mujhe tere lapat mein jalna rakh ho jana hai

Tu zakham de agar
Marham bhi aakar tu lagaaye
Zakham mein bhi mujhko pyaar aaye
Dariya o dariya
Doopne de mujhe dariya
Doopne de mujhe dariya

Rehna Tu
Hai Jaisa Tu
Thoda sa dard tu
Thoda Sukun

Rehna Tu
Hai Jaisa Tu
Dheema Dheema jhonka
Ya phir junoon
Haath tham chalna hi
To dono ke daye haath sang kaise
Haath tham chalna hi
To dono ke daye haath sang kaise
Ek daaya hoga ek baaiya hoga
Tham le haath yeh thaam le
Chalna hai sang tham le”

P.S. Sonam’s look in this song makes me remember about a friend’s better half!

Mayank: Now you know why you should feel blessed! :)

Johari Window

Arena

(known to self and others)

caring, dignified, friendly, intelligent, loving, organised

Blind Spot

(known only to others)

able, adaptable, bold, brave, cheerful, complex, confident, dependable, energetic, extroverted, helpful, idealistic, independent, ingenious, kind, knowledgeable, modest, nervous, patient, proud, reflective, religious, responsive, searching, self-assertive, self-conscious, sentimental, silly, spontaneous, trustworthy, warm, witty

Façade

(known only to self)

Unknown

(known to nobody)

accepting, calm, clever, giving, happy, introverted, logical, mature, observant, powerful, quiet, relaxed, sensible, shy, sympathetic, tense, wise

All Percentages

able (5%) accepting (0%) adaptable (5%) bold (10%) brave (5%) calm (0%) caring (31%) cheerful (10%) clever (0%) complex (5%) confident (31%) dependable (21%) dignified (21%) energetic (10%) extroverted (5%) friendly (42%) giving (0%) happy (0%) helpful (5%) idealistic (5%) independent (10%) ingenious (5%) intelligent (47%) introverted (0%) kind (10%) knowledgeable (21%) logical (0%) loving (21%) mature (0%) modest (10%) nervous (5%) observant (0%) organised (31%) patient (5%) powerful (0%) proud (26%) quiet (0%) reflective (15%) relaxed (0%) religious (5%) responsive (5%) searching (10%) self-assertive (21%) self-conscious (10%) sensible (0%) sentimental (21%) shy (0%) silly (10%) spontaneous (5%) sympathetic (0%) tense (0%) trustworthy (15%) warm (21%) wise (0%) witty (10%)

Created by the Interactive Johari Window on 4.2.2009, using data from 19 respondents.
You can make your own Johari Window, or view RhiannonRhythm’s full data.

B’day, Best time to say “Thanks Mom” :)

Mom and a Baby - Copyrighted Image - www.msholinprosales.com

Words don’t come easily…yes, when it is your b’day…..words really don’t come easily. How do you feel, what you are thinking…..? It is something like, yes there is something inside, but how would I pen it down…..so all thoughts will be rumblings, and a flow of thoughts is also not guaranteed…….anyways here I go……

This day is special for me….true. But, more than that what I feel this day is special for my mom. I was her very first creation. I sense a unique feeling imagining, you bring a life to the world, and then u see it growing day by day……….The first thing I am going to do in the morning, is rush to my mom’s lap and tell her, look mom your tiny daughter has grown into a splendid woman. :)

Mom and I have already spent the entire Sunday, trying to make this day memorable. I have not shopped this much even in the entire last year. My room is right now full with loads of goodies, neatly wrapped. I will be in my best form tomorrow, a glow of 25 beautiful years intact on my face……..yeah, really a long time…….but guess what, I still feel like a new born kid at heart….its true I am no longer the person, who used to run across the fields and used to color all my home walls with different creations, but guess I have been doing that through my mind now……!!!

Perhaps this is the right time and also the right platform to tell my mom………..thanks for bringing me to this beautiful place, thanks for keeping me so close to your heart, thanks for giving me a beautiful mind and soul, ,…………and ya, thanks for being my mom :)

At my terrace, Mother Nature brought me a beautiful gift, the first rose of the entire season bloomed this very evening……as if it was a gift sent at the right time. It’s drizzling here, little by little, I looked up the sky, there amidst the blue background, those biggy clouds were smiling, I gave them a flying kiss, and in return they sent a breeze to touch down my face :) .

B’day is the best time that reminds you, that you are a beautiful creation, so as long as you are here, don’t forget to spread the smile across.
Today, I have already completed a phase of my life and trust me, I truly feel like a woman,  confident, happy, independent, lively, blessed, ……..and yes very much alive.

Thank god, for all those gems whom I call my friends, thanks for giving me best of the parents, thanks for two little special babies who were born as my siblings, thanks for giving me a chance to love and lose, thanks for a heart who can feel and breath the rhythm around, thanks for a beautiful mind who can read and create thoughts, thanks for bringing so much positivism in my life, …………………..basically thanks for making me the person that I am.

Now, I am feeling sleepy, so here is a b’day kiss for myself, let me drift into a peaceful sleep, because tomorrow Rhiannon will be stepping on the earth, to feel its blessings, earthlings, time for celebrations…..yupppiieeeee……:)
Goodnight!!!

Meow :)…. New language of love!!!!

Meow in her young age!!

This is one of the most sought after post on my blog (courtesy: stats):) And the best thing about this post is it gets updated, as the story unfolds. I don’t know after this most recent edit (September 29, 2009); when will it be updated next, but at least this is for sure, till the time, the author of this post is alive, he/she will be giving voice to this ‘meow’, about whom you are going to read next: :)

2001: The baby kitten opens her eyes, she is so scared. Everybody calls her little meow, but she is so much different from the other kittens. She does not look like one, but still she sticks to the belief that she is a one, because evrybody calls her so. The world is such a bad place……people know how to walk on the dead souls. She is as innocent as the new bud…..Will she survive? Will she be spared?

All she had seen was the fluttering of wind, blooming of flowers, descending of clouds and falling of rain on that vast green field. She used to run around the field, better than anyone. She knows one day she will grow up to become more clever than anyone. Sometimes, when she is in deep musings she wonders what it is like to me a lioness…..and the next moment in her empire of mind she is the one. Then she sees a lion in the distance, all she realizes is there exists something inside, which beats faster than that train which crosses the old bridge near the fields everyday. It was nothing she felt the first blissful feeling of her life that the world likes to call as ‘Love’….!!!

August 2002: The lion is leaving the fields, he has to enter the jungle. To carve a niche for himself. In last ten months he has seen this little baby of ours growing, they are befriended, the green pastures are such a place that all the animals are in harmony with each other . He knows what she feels. But oooohh, she is a kitten and a baby:(. The lion bids her goodbye…….he goes ahead to find a world of his own, in search of his lioness. Our baby kitten cries her heart out. She complains to that “power” that everybody says is responsible for the lightening during a thunderstorm. She pledges she will grow up to b a big, powerful cat oneday and never set her heart on anybody else. Memories do not leave her mind, they become an inseparable part of our little meoow.

August 2002-August2005: Green pastures had turned into a battle ground. The fittest had to survive here……..Our little kitten has grown up……….all the animals are scared of her now. Nobody tells her what is the reason, but she gets to see it in their eyes. Something is wrong. When she walks on her path, the path is vacated. She has felt the change in her claws, in her gait, in her strength, she is the new queen of the jungle………..but heart in heart, she is our little meoww. All this while, you might be wondering, has she forgotton the lion. Nopes, she daily comes to that small hill where she had seen the lion resting for the first time. This is a ritual for her, and a reason for her survival……!!!!

August 2005: Pastures have been taken by the government. the animals are moving to the different regions. Our little meow decides to leave the green valley and come to the big jungle. She makes her journey to the place. This is her first time in the jungle. She feels so lost. But, there is something about her that still make the animals leave their space. Soon, she makes a place for herself. But, she still misses her old kingdom, where she had acquired her own status of the Queen!!!!

One fine day, our little meow happened to tread across the bridge at the end of the jungle. There flows a river with a clear spring water. She walks to the end of the river and dips her head to sip the water from the river. Booommmmmm!!! what is that. she is taken aback. This is not me, she says to herself………….arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr ” I look more like……..like ……………..like………………the lioness!!!!
Meow in the jungle

The realization daunt upon her…..!!! oh!!! so taht was the reason for my gait, and confidence, she mutters under her breath…….smiles spreads on those lips, eyes sparkle with an unbound happiness!!!! She runs back to her den, she knows what she needs to do now. She needs to search for the lost lion anyhow. She knows he went back to the jungle…………..she wants to meet him and let him know that the little meow has grown up into his lioness, and there was not a moment in those six years that she had not missed him.

August 2006-2007: Our little meow, oh sorry queenie lioness has already find her Lion back. The first thing that she tells him is her meowww :) , the same old sound that as a little meow she had uttered to him. The lion is delighted to see her back. he has grown into the Lion of the jungle……….he had seen a lot in this span……………and the saddest part being he is now so disheartened, that he tells the meow to go back, and find a new dream, a dream she can chase, a dream that might b suitable for her……..what he does not realizes is that meowww…..will never do that………no matter what………!!!! Because she might be the queenie lioness ruling the jungle………..heart in heart she still the meowww, who loves her lion more than anything. and you know what, she still prays to that lightening gord who comes around the month of August every year, to let her one wish come true….the wish that she had saved for these last six years………….The story still is not complete………….lets c what our little meow gets…….will she survive this time, will she get her wish granted…may be that old bumbble bee that has its home on that old oak, and that predicts the future, will be knowing……:)!!!

August 2009: Life was going as usual for our meow; it took a little more than eight years for her to find her Lion. Everyday, they were getting closer to their dream until the morning of August 23.

Meow could not believe her ears; the Lion was gone! Gone forever! She had tried to reason out, but could not succeed. For the first time in her life, the little meow cried. She did not even touched the bowl of milk left on her doorway by her friends for next four days. How could she? Her hopes, dreams, visions, all were gone. Meow thought, perhaps this is the end. She wanted to jump over the cliff at the end of the jungle, the cliff that would have taken her down the abyss, where none of the animals ever dare to walk; if it was not for that saint who was praying over the rock.

He told her that everything in life happened for a reason, and most of the times the reason is good. He told her that the MAKER who created her was protecting her in every way. Meow knows life is not going to be easy and she needs to start afresh. She is more than sure that she will never be able to forgive the Lion. She knows it’s time to leave this jungle; the same jungle which was her home for all these years, the jungle that hold so many memories. The jungle she wanted to start her life in.

September 2009: Our meow is more than happy. :) She could not have seen God’s way of being fair in a better way. Does she remembers the Lion? Of course Yes, :) but as a memory that was good and glad that it was over. Our meow has been invited into a new jungle and she is planning to leave this place for good. :) Life hold so many miracles that are waiting for her to unfold. Our meow knows there are more heights to be reached, and more places to be explored……and meow’s journey continues. She still believes that nothing gives you more power, or makes you more happy/contended or makes you so aware/enlightened as being in Love. Whenever she is alone, she still utters under her breath – a little ‘meow’ sound – to reaffirm her faith in these beautiful words  called LIFE and LOVE !:)

So next time, u know u love somebody just say meow…….:)

P.S The Lion is well settled is perhaps happy too and sadly this is the last occasion when he is part of our meow story! The character ends here….and will no longer be the part of our meow chronicle! :) Adios Amigos!

To b Continued……!!!

Disclaimer: The characters in the above narration are purely fictional, any resemblance to any person or animal living or dead is purely coincidental ;)

He bowled me all over – :) do not scratch your head, it was a baby ;)

Yesterday, i went to see a family friend of mine. recently, they had welcomed a bundle of joy, in their family. Yes you guessed it right. a small baby, the most miraculous creation on this planet.

Before our meeting with this beautiful creation, we decided to give a small gift t him, a token of our love and affection to this little thing. so the hunt began, me and my mom decided tht we will search for an appropriate gift this evening. Once we had shopped for a good dress(My favourite pink coloured baba suit), the next thing we were looking for was a rattle. Since, the baby was only two months old, we did not expect it to be very responsive.when my mother was browsing through certain shelves in the mall, i happen to get lost in one part of the shop, (that i always manage to, dnt knw why), where they displayed all sort of stuffed toys………..gosh, one thing i always crave for….since the toys were displayed in big shelves and some were lying on the floor too…..i don’t know what took me over. there i was sitting on the floor, with jeans stretched in an unusual manner and i was cuddling all those teddy bear and dolls that were coming my way…….for a time i even forgot, what am i a grown up girl doing on the floor with these pretty things around me. Mom had to literally drag me out of that place.mom still things that, craving for a teddy hug displays an insecuer attitude within u!!!! don’t know the logic behid this. but yes, i go gaga over such toys……wish i had a BF who was more than willing to gift me stuffed toys for evry small reason….hhhhahahahahhahahaa

so, in continuation to our desperate hunt, we ended up purchasing a sweet doll. I know mom kept it locked in the almirah, because she was still not sure of my intentions.

Anyhow, we went to see teh baby next day. i was not expecting much from the trip. since, i was under the notion that babies at such a small age are quite bore. well, i went because i wanted to avoid a bore company alone at home, beacause i had already called all my friends and there was nothing much to do also.

as soon as we entered our friend’s house we were escorted to an inner room. and there he was, lying on the bed, pushing and throwing his hands in the most unusual mannner.mom, took him in his arms…….he was not beautiful, but the smile he displayed from ear to ear caught me offguard. automatically my hands stretched, and in a minute i was having that pretty thing in my arms. there he was fully activated, charged battery, who was passing all sorts of vibrations through my entire body. Perhaps, it was its innocence, charm, or its infectious enthusiasm in the eyes, (that i hardly expected from 2 months old infant) that made me experience a surge of happiness that i , for few months , was trying to create artificially. There i was standing in the middle of the room, charmed by this little charmer, who took my heart, in a sec………he was smiling in my eyes, and sometimes sucking the end of my dupatta, giving me some beautiful moments that i am penning down here.

well, can also say, in the end i was happy to part with that doll……because it was ultimately going to the one, who caught me unprepared!!!!!!

Sarah Waters – Spellbound

I can not keep the work of fiction in my hand down even for a minute. The piece of writing is not only exquisite, it casts a spell on your entire being. Yes, It is none other than Sarah Waters, the renowed British Novelist. She started creating her works from 1998. Since, then the peolpe have not stopped admiring her work. I have already completed three of her books, Tipping the Velvet, Affinity, and Fingersmith. Night Watch is the only one remaining now that i need to admire :) .

No wonder her books have been nominated for the prizes such as Orange prize, Man Booker prize. Whosoever has read her work once will surely fall in love with her story narration……..I look forward to reading more works from this great author. :) ………..may be you can say I am spellbound!!!!

Official site for Sarah Waters: http://www.sarahwaters.com/

Sarah Waters - Image subject to copyright

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